Six of One, or Half Dozen of the Other? Level 8,6

“False creature!” shrieked the Mistress at her maid,who thought petulantly the same of her Better.”

The deep reflection that I shared with you in the last two entries has become a sort of tenderizer of my entire body. I am experiencing weepyness over things done and not done, yet I recognize the release of the pain and the unconscious memories that have been unvisited or not so well buried over the years. Those infernal and relentless questions remain unanswered but released like bubbles under the waters of my soul.

I want much for my life and I begin to see that it is achievable if I can trust this process and let go and let God. So to those of you who have been kind enough to leave me comments and to encourage me, blessed thanks. I see that whatever I think or feel positive or negative is the opposite side of the same coin. You can’t keep a good woman down and you can’t hold down the good in any one (woman). “I rise,” as Maya said

I love this owman. She is one of my sheroes!
I love this owman. She is one of my sheroes!

Open, level 8, 4

Open, Level 8, 4

While listening to Level 8, Immersion 4, I drifted far away. I could just barely hear John and I faintly followed the music. Then suddenly, my head jerked and my mouth snapped shut just as I began to drool! I had been gone.

I am going truly, deeply in and down and under with this set of reprogramming, and as I said yesterday I am becoming more thoughtful about what it will mean to me to actually have more disposable income, What it will mean to have my life choices and my outreach extended? I have had chunks of money in my life and in no time blew through it. I have saved and then used up the savings sometimes to good purpose. When I have money, all I can think of is that I have it ,and I can buy something! The liberty of it! Soon I buy something, and something else,again, and soon I have no money. And I am happy.

I realized I am frightened by the prospect of having more. I asked “Will it change me?” I guess what that means is will it call for new responsible behaviors? Will I make the same old mistakes or exhibit the same tendencies? Will I need a new manner of carrying myself or presenting myself? Will I need to enable myself to meet a new breed of people who are different somehow and I will be called upon to be different to be in their company? Will I just show my ultimate incompetence with money?

I am being hyper vigilant, but my fright is real. I don’t want to let my self down. I don’t want to let Viv down. We have a future, some common dreams, and we want to live by the sea.
I have spent 50 of my nearly 70 years being an ordinary working woman with my share of the pie being adequate. When I had money before my paltry retirement, I have given my energy and energies and wherewithal to business and travel and charity. What makes me think I can really do it again with better results?

What will make the difference now? What is it that has been opened inside me that gives me this tiny niggling worry. The audio Accelerating Your Wealth Programming has opened me to myself. I recognize the change because I am working at it. I am investigating opportunities and studying my own habits and beliefs, listening to the audios faithfully. Let me not get cold feet. I have a lot at stake–my future with Vi, my dream of global service, my desire to be able to buy a house and travel. But can I do this? Can I just stay open with all this trembling? Are my goals strong and pure enough to shield me? Do I want what I am asking for?IMG_0382

Liberty, Freedom, Leisure, level 8,3

Liberty, Freedom, Leisure, Level 8, 3

Critical distinctions arise for me. Is it really money that will give me freedom? Is freedom the same as liberty? Is liberty the same as leisure?
How have I defined these things before? Why now do I question their worth to my self expression?

“Financial freedom” is the buzz word. It is having no worries about money or maybe having money to off-set and dissipate worries. It is having money in the bank and good quality belongings in your life. It is being able to pay for what one wants or needs. It is knowing your worth and having an assurance it cannot be lessened by lack. But maybe it is not really being interested in money at all. Maybe it is being okay with what you have; blessing and showing appreciation for the givens that cost nothing–the waking from sleep, the air we breath, an adequate roof over our heads, the expectation and granting of meals for sustenance, friends, family, and a good head on our shoulders with a respectable appreciation for nature and life. Suppose I am free already because I have no huge debts, no accounts to manage, nor taxes nor employees to pay. Maybe I am financially free because I have enough to grant me the pleasure of being. This brings me to Leisure.

So without money can one have leisure? Is the quality of leisure measured by money? Must the type of leisure be determined by money? If I never got to go jet skiing or to take a world cruise, would I be less able to call myself one who enjoys leisure? I think not. Leisure is my time to spend in any pleasurable way I choose:shopping, watching TV, bird watching, sleeping on the lawn, flipping through fashion magazines, following my favorite celebrities and the daily news. Am I pursuing more money so as to upgrade my leisure? Probably not. Then what makes leisure so important? Liberty does.

Liberty allows me to go and come at will where I will. It is wherein I make choices–this and not that, red and not blue, there and not here, those and not these. Stay or go. I choose a thousand times a day, little things:what to pay attention to, what to say or do in response to tragic news or astonishing good news. I am at liberty because my soul is free, my body is mine, my thoughts are my own. This realization costs no money. The absolute preciousness of my life and my freedom to actualize my liberty and leisure make me a free spirit, one who probably could live as well with no more money than I have now than if I had more next week. The next question is will money change me? Is this the real question I am asking?Am I afraid to have more because I’ll need to do and be more than to simply enjoy the simple things of life that satisfy me?

Yes folks, this program is definitely calling up the depths of thought and action about money.self expression self expression 2

Double it, level 8, 2

Double It, Level 8, 2

I listened to level 8, immersion 2 twice in a row this morning. The second time with my eyes open while I worked on my web page. High efficiency. I have been having some staggering vertigo,but today it is better as I asked my guides why.
First my online client and “friend” Glynis said it was likely inner ear infection and that I can relate to. I drew a few cards and my guides told me to use my crystals to balance. So I have on my torquoise and my amethyst bracelets today. Feeling much better.

It is very hard to pinpoint the physical effects of this work so I can’t say if the fact that I could hardly sleep last night is related. The moon has been doing some powerful pulling on earth,too. But usually as soon as I lay my body down I am gone for the night. So, I think lots is firing up there in the old noggin’. I have this visual of my brain that I can bring up. My left hemisphere is large and full like a new baked loaf of bread. My right hemisphere is smaller, like a serving of couscous with sparkling red fairy dust over it. The imbalance is visible yet healthy. I’m trusting all is well.
Hope you all are moving forward and enjoying your successes with the program and in your lives. Double it!Secret agent

Follow the yellow brick Road, level 7, 6

Follow the Yellow Brick Road, Level 7, 6

I’m not off to see any wizard….
I already saw him
Instead of being behind a curtain, he was standing right out in the open
Doing a brain-a-thon, had a bag full of theory and proofs,theta waves too
He had a heart, and brains, and courage–but I was with no scarecrow,
Fact was I was my own scarecrow, chasing away my fears,
That flop and call out like ravens over a cornfield,like a wicked witch
He didn’t give me a heart–since i already had one–but he did give me a map and a audio hourglass, time in a bottle, a timeless gift and –shall I say it?–the enchanted use of imagination and will .

There are numerous Munchkins hidden in the roses and behind the giant lillies and plants, they are coming out to meet the wizard—
Oops, my mistake, they were swept up in the twister of change
Like me, they’re following the yellow brick road….

“We hear he is a whiz of a wiz, if ever a wiz there was”
Pretty certain about that–yep, pretty certain
I hear that in heaven the streets are paved with gold
That’s why I’m following the Yellow Brick road
The wizard says the way is paved with goals.

Enjoyman behind the curtain wicked witch wizard